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I spent the day in my own silence.
No music.
No TV –
Okay, maybe a little TV
For the stories of Naruto
And my own enjoyment.
I barely spoke
And when I did
I was only just audible.
Words blurred and fused
Together and damn near
Songs swam in my periphery
And in my mind
Like they were playing off
Old gramophones
From forgotten times on vinyl
Of distant thoughts
I hadn’t pulled into recall
For a while.
The memories attached to them
Would swim into my vision
And I could almost live within them
In my current and present time.
But then they’d fade away
As the next thought began
To play
With its own background music –
I remember joy
I remember pain.
And so I geared down
And geared up and pulled out
The yoga mat
And did a little bit of
Exercise to divert
My brain from that
And for a good long moment
I was happy to be distracted.
I could hear my own breathing.
I could feel my heart beating.
I could feel my balance returning –
Even though, sometimes
I’d lose it in between.
I was reminded of the old times
When I needed for no one
In this space of mine.
And even though it was
Some kind of dismissal of
My future life –
This image in my head of
Without you and you
Just me – in the beauty of my
Of my silence and quietness
It looked –
It felt good –